Summer Officially Started When Facebook Friend Complained How Hot It Was Outside

Manalapan, NJ – Despite what the calendar companies printed for June 21st, summer officially started three days prior as a Facebook friend complained how hot it was outside. “Ughhh, it is so hot outside I don’t even feel like moving!” Facebook friend Jessica McCare tapped away on her phone’s keypad before mistakenly adding a teary-eyed laughing emoji thinking it was a sweating emoji. “Dude, this weather is so not cool… like literally bro, not cool at all! Yo honestly, I can’t drive to the gym in this heat,” replied another Facebook friend Mark Metchin who was also the first to declare winter by stating how “freaking lame-ass cold” it was outside back on November 12th. At press time, the temperature dipped back to 72 degrees, and summer was just confirm over on SnapChat.

Last August’s Calendar Photo Hoping to Remain as Apartment Wall Art

Everett, WA – Fearing the inevitable with the arrival of a new year, a determined calendar photo representing last August is hoping to remain on the wall as art for the apartment. “With this being a new year, I fully realize my services are no longer needed. But it’s undeniable how much the tenant loved that I evoked the summer with my palm trees and surfing waves,” argued the 10×10 picture of a small beach from Maui. “I mean, yeah, throw away December because no one wants to look at reindeer year-round, and who really cares about the cliché person holding an umbrella for April? But I can not only look good on a wall; I can motivate someone to just live life, bro.” At press time, the tenant was unboxing a paper shredder after hanging up his new poster of a California beach.